Monday, April 19, 2010

An Angry Man

Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul. (Proverbs 22:24-25 KJV)

What I like about Proverbs is the admonition followed by result. Reminds me of the IF THEN statements in programming. If you are friends with an angry man, you will learn his ways and damage your soul.

A violent man enticeth his neighbour, and leadeth him into the way that is not good. He shutteth his eyes to devise froward things: moving his lips he bringeth evil to pass. (Proverbs 16:29-30 KJV)

There are other verses in Proverbs telling us to keep away from angry and violent men, pointing us to the positive.

He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. (Proverbs 16:32 KJV)

Why, then, do girls find them so attractive and enter into abusive relationships?

I don’t think I’m so unusual, and I’ve known a few in my own life. I expect others have known some, too. Kind, sweet girls who choose men who are inappropriate. Psychologists tell us some think they deserve the anger such a man generates. In other cases, the young lady thinks he’ll change because he loves her. Too often the anger turns to physical violence, to the point of death.

I have known two elderly women who lived with such men. The only way that is not good they were led into was their own daily interaction with the angry man. Both continued to hold their marriage vows sacred, raising their children to love and serve the Lord through decades of example.

At times, the anger leads to broken bones. For protection against continued physical abuse, divorce is necessary. To do so after years together is a devastating blow, an admittance of personal failure. Yet, it should not be. With grace and dignity such a wife shows us an example of faithfulness that he has not been able to remove.

She does not enter into divorce with rancor but with sadness that it has become necessary. She wished to continue her life with the husband of her youth, expecting him to rejoice with her.

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. (Proverbs 5:18 KJV)

Instead, she is faced with acknowledging treachery in her marriage.

Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. (Malachi 2:14 KJV)

God has known us since before we were born. Though we do not know what He has in store for us, we know that His plan contains beauty. Let us always keep to His plan, not our own.

He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end. (Ecclesiastes 3:11 KJV)


  1. I have a friend who just buried her husband yesterday. He was an angry man and couldn't get along with anyone. He learned it from his angry father. In the early hours Friday morning his wife shot and killed him after he had had them trapped in a room with a gun held to them and threatening to kill them all. Their children are 10 and 12 years old. Hopefully she can break the ugly cycle.

  2. Yes, it is a cycle and they somehow feel they must stay in a abusive sitution. They feel that is all they deserve. Someone very dear to us was in this situation but finally got the courage to break from it. It really is sad.
    That is why young people should make sure that who they plan to marry is God's will.


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