MRI Wednesday

 

Doesn't that look clean and huge and completely above my ability to understand? I've allowed myself to be shoved into one of these, head first, for over 15 years, at least once a year, sometimes twice or more. My first post about my meningioma was in 2012. I've followed up every two or three years about Henry and it's growth.

Yes, I named my meningioma Henry. If I'm going to live with this, I don't want a medical name. I've made my peace with this situation - as long as Henry is a quiet apartment dweller (no loud parties or bands!) we can live together. If a problem develops, he's not easily evicted. I cannot have it removed through regular surgery, and even cyberknife could be a problem, so we just live together.

I made much of my medical decision based on scripture:

And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. (Matthew 5:29)

Henry is an anomally - not a normal part of the human body, but not cancerous, not fast growing, and it can be watched as we wait for additional information. Two other calicified, and much smaller, meningiomas did not grow as Henry has. With all that information balanced against what might be encountered with an open skull surgery, we continue to watch and wait.

I have one other physical limitation when it comes to MRIs - I am claustrophobic. Put me in a tight enclosed space with no exit defined and my breathing is affected. I move from knowing things are fine to being positive there is a problem I cannot see nor "fix." I did the first of or fifteen years of MRIs using a variety of uncontrollable mind control efforts, and these last few years a full prescription of one diazepam. The result was: I cannot drive myself home after the MRI. Fortunately, I have a capable family with a wealth of possibilities, and I've been driven home by almost all of them at one time or another as they responded to a need:

But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. (1 John 3:17-18)

Frankly, every time I've needed an answer to a question, I've found an answer in the Bible. I know - that doesn't sound possible in a world where so much technology has been invented since the the lasts book in the Bible was written. But, the Bible says:

The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun. (Ecclesiastes 1:9)

That holds true even though the Ten Commandments were written in stone, the New Testament on papyrus, and my computer puts letters on a screen. Methodologies are different, but there is no new thing under the sun remains valid. The Bible will not describe what I use to write, but it comes through technology from the same brain functions all authors use:

And he saith unto them, Are ye so without understanding also? Do ye not perceive, that whatsoever thing from without entereth into the man, it cannot defile him; Because it entereth not into his heart, but into the belly, and goeth out into the draught, purging all meats? And he said, That which cometh out of the man, that defileth the man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man. (Mark 7:18-23)

I am responsible for every word placed on this blog. It came from my brain, through my fingers. Because that's important to me, I judge my thoughts against the Bible. What I place here is what comes from me. If having Henry were ever to affect that thought process - I would choose the latest most accurate medical technology to remove that meningioma!

Matthew Chapter 13

Matthew 13 Overview from Biblegateway 

 

I used part of Matthew 13 yesterday, linking to the entire parable plus Jesus' explanation to His disciples. The Bible Gateway is a tool I use to introduce people to Bible reading. There are so many ways to put a Bible in someone's hands - and as far as I'm concerned, that's outstanding.

I've had comments in my social media posts, and earlier in my blogging, that people should not read the Bible. It is confusing, it has messages to specific people not for our use, it was written for specific times, and parts do not apply today.

May I assure you -- you have no reason to take my word that the Bible is true. I am not an accomplished scholar. I do not have any degree, much less one in theology. May I assure you - that does not matter. Take a look at the men Jesus chose to be His disciples. Head back to the Old Testament and take a look at the people who spoke for God - how many of them were scholars or dedicated to theological studies?

Paul was one of the most studied Apostles. His background was wealth and the best schools. He had been indoctrinated in the Pharisaical life from childhood. He could trace his lineage back to Abraham, as self-described:

Though I might also have confidence in the flesh. If any other man thinketh that he hath whereof he might trust in the flesh, I more: Circumcised the eighth day, of the stock of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, an Hebrew of the Hebrews; as touching the law, a Pharisee; Concerning zeal, persecuting the church; touching the righteousness which is in the law, blameless. But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ. (Philippians 3:4-7)

We are not told what Paul was doing during the time the four gospels were occuring, but we do read what Pharisees were doing - for example:

But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees come to his baptism, he said unto them, O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come? (Matthew 3:7)

For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew 5:20)

Then the Pharisees went out, and held a council against him, how they might destroy him. (Matthew 12:14)

Then came his disciples, and said unto him, Knowest thou that the Pharisees were offended, after they heard this saying? (Matthew 15:12)

That is a small sample of a large number of scriptures where Pharisees are mentioned. The only Pharisee mentioned coming to Jesus with questions and listening was Nicodemus, who also helped bury Jesus in the tomb. Paul only believed when he met the risen Jesus on the road to Damascus.

Both Paul and Thomas doubted the reports that Jesus had risen. Thomas missed that first day and said:

“The other disciples therefore said unto him, We have seen the Lord. But he said unto them, Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.” (John 20:25, KJV)

When Thomas saw Jesus, he didn't touch Him. He didn't put his finger in the nail holes. He didn't put his hand into the sword wound as Jesus suggested:

“And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.” (John 20:28, KJV)

Paul was the only one in his entourage that saw Jesus. He believed and said:

“And he trembling and astonished said, Lord, what wilt thou have me to do? And the Lord said unto him, Arise, and go into the city, and it shall be told thee what thou must do.” (Acts 9:6, KJV)

Be blessed, as Jesus said, by believing without seeing. We will have eternity to see our Lord. 

When Do We Listen?

Borrowed from Commons

I always have more questions than answers, but often answers show up right and when needed. Especially when we listen. This graphic shows someone listening to another. Wonder what was said.

Thursday I did so well listening to my own body. I didn't feel "well." You know, when you can't define "well" yet know something isn't "right"? Quick thermometer check showed a low grade fever and people I been around have a "bug," so take a pill, rest, and get better is somewhere in a book, right?

That night was uncomfortable and sleep was fitful. So Friday morning after breakfast a nap was easily acceptable. The swollen left leg I woke up to wasn't, neither was the new redness by my ankle. Doctor's office closed at noon. Did you know four adults can not make a decision about what one should do? Especially when one states "I do not think I should go to the ER!"

By Saturday morning I did think I should call the 24/7 nurse our insurance offers who explained why I not only needed to go, but why it needed to be ER rather than urgent care. We went. I'm getting better. 

Why do we do that? Humans are good about putting off what is inevitable. We think we have forever - not listening to the time limits that exist for a variety of reasons. At 85 I have survived longer than most actuarial tables anticipate. I should pay attention to any change my body demonstrates - but I don't want to know why it changed. 

Of course my own thoughts apply that same physical logic tour souls. Christians have the Holy Spirit's guidance, but we can quench that:

Quench not the Spirit. (1 Thessalonians 5:19)

Non-Christians have the Spirit reaching out to them, too. The sower example Jesus gave (Matthew 13:1-23) is best when he explains how those who hear the word respond incorrectly:

But he that received the seed into stony places, the same is he that heareth the word, and anon with joy receiveth it; Yet hath he not root in himself, but dureth for a while: for when tribulation or persecution ariseth because of the word, by and by he is offended. He also that received seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word; and the care of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, choke the word, and he becometh unfruitful. (Matthew 13:20-22)

There are times I've heard His words and ignored them. Those times I've been an unfruitful Christian. By not doing what I know is to be done is actually as bad as doing what I know is sinful. Paul faced that:

For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. (Romans 7:18-19)

It is only by God's grace that our sinfulness does not overtake me:

Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but be thou partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God; Who hath saved us, and called us with an holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began, But is now made manifest by the appearing of our Saviour Jesus Christ, who hath abolished death, and hath brought life and immortality to light through the gospel: (2 Timothy 1:8-10)

I feel a need to share God's answer to all of my questions. I'm not that different from anyone who has been face to face with the question of how did I get here and what do I do next? Those always indicate turmoil and some distress. It is not a psychological answer but a spiritual one that offers peace. A much more lasting answer than mental or physical therapy is the peace offered as a gift. 

Much longer lasting, too. An acknowledgement of the God of the Bible requires acknowledgement that He is the God of the living - Moses, Elisha, Lazarus, and Jesus, the Messiah of the living God - and me, along with billions of others. 

Are you with me now?