LAD The Widow Maker

 

This is one of the reasons I haven't spent time on the computer - I was 90+% blocked and needed angioplasty and a stent before experiencing the actual heart attack. Fortunately, I found a great cardiologist who listened to me and my symptoms. Be certain they are clear to you to - it happens to both men and women, at differing ages. Pay attention to the symptoms your body shares. If your doctor isn't responsive to your questions, see another doctor.

There were three other reasons from as far back as the fall of 2024 that have slowed me down during that year - treatments and body reactions to Atrial Fibrillation, a fall with a small bone break, and a parathyroid gland that decided to work overtime and mess up several body functions that hadn't been part of the heart, bone, bruises issues. It has taken over a full year and a half to see enough doctors, hospitals, and I'm still in cardio rehab three times a week along with physical rehab twice a week, plus a family that fluctuates between "You need to be active," and "Don't do too much." There is a fine line and I stumble across it often.

However - it is my own responsibility to own up to the fact that one of the things I let slip was sharing the Bible. It is one thing I should have been doing through the entire period, and I didn't. The Bible has lots of examples of people that didn't do what they were supposed to do according to God's planning.

We could begin with Adam and Eve - but we know their story all to well. Or Abraham - who lied about his wife - kind of - and made a king unhappy. Or Joseph's brothers - who carried sibling rivalry way too far, yet God used the circumstances to create a nation. But my favorite example is a man who is described by the Lord as "a man after his own heart," and is yet known as a sinner - King David:

And Samuel said to Saul, Thou hast done foolishly: thou hast not kept the commandment of the LORD thy God, which he commanded thee: for now would the LORD have established thy kingdom upon Israel for ever. But now thy kingdom shall not continue: the LORD hath sought him a man after his own heart, and the LORD hath commanded him to be captain over his people, because thou hast not kept that which the LORD commanded thee. (1 Samuel 13:13-14)

We all sin. From Eve down to me and everyone in between and around, we're all sinners - as recently as this moment. David committed several before the first of the sons Bathsheba bore him by adultry with her and planning the death of her husband. Yet God saw David as a man after God's own heart. I believe that is shown in the Psalms he wrote about his relationship with God, but mostly in Psalm 51 where he shows contrition over both sins that cost him their son:

Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me. Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit. Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee. Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: and my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness. (Psalms 51:10-14)

There was no sacrifice that came to David's mind that could cleanse his guilt, the blood guilt of taking lives. However, David had a personal relationship with God, was inspired by God to write:

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. (Psalms 51:17)

I firmly believe that forgiveness was open to even Judas Iscariot. Instead of turning his broken spirit into a contrite heart to be healed of God, Judas took his own life while retaining the bloodguilt he had taken.

Don't keep guilt. Keeping it in our hearts and mind helps it grow and can remove any room for God's forgiveness in our hearts. "If" truly is an illusion. There is nothing different to be done in the past. Nothing can change that has been done. However, everything in the future can be different with God's acceptance of a broken and contrite heart. Take it to God. He is ready to heal.

He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. (Psalms 147:3)